My husband and I have been praying for more than two years for him to get a job promotion. There were times when it seemed as though the doors were wide open and he would be able to walk right through; these times were followed by periods when it seemed as though the doors were permanently closed. There were so many times when I would get discouraged and disheartened. I often found myself praying, “Lord, Your Word says that hope deferred makes the heart sick, and my heart is truly sick. I don’t understand why You’re not answering.”
We also had many others praying with us. It would break my heart when every time they would ask if we had heard anything, we could reply only, “No.” I even grew annoyed with the heartfelt questions. I would think, “If I had any news to share, I would have told you.” This was absolutely the wrong response to have. The fact that people were asking should have been a blessing and an encouragement to me. It meant that they actually were praying with and for me and were looking for an answer actively. My heart was pricked by this realization.
My heart was pricked again when the answer finally came. I was over the moon! The Lord finally saw fit to answer our prayers! He answered in a way that was far greater than we could have imagined. However, that joy was short-lived.
After all of the contracts were signed, the compensation department came forward to say that they could not actually offer him the amount that was on the contract. I was devastated. I did not understand. The contract had already been signed. I had been praising the Lord and sharing with everyone about how God answered exceedingly and abundantly above all that we had asked or thought possible. Why was this happening?
I prayed and begged the Lord to compel them to reconsider. Our family could do so much with the compensation amount offered on the contract. However, my prayers were to no avail. The compensation department was going to lower the amount.
I was defeated. I kept trying to tell myself to praise the Lord anyway and to rejoice in the answer to the original prayer for the promotion. I will not lie—I was struggling. I would praise the Lord one minute and then cry the next. As if my heart were not sick enough, I found out a couple of days later that my chances of getting promoted within my side business were thwarted because a teammate was quitting. “Really?!” I cried out, “Lord, I just don’t understand!”
As it happens so often, I found my answer, but it was not the one for which I was looking. I was reading my Bible one morning, and the Lord spoke to me. I was reading in Exodus about how God was going to drive out the inhabitants from the Promised Land when I came across my answer. Exodus 23:30 says, By little and little I will drive them out from before thee, until thou be increased, and inherit the land. God reminded me that He does not always give us the whole blessing at once. Sometimes, He gives it to us …By little and little…
I see the mountain in front of me, and I beg God to move it. However, He wants me to climb it instead. He wants to strengthen and condition me along the way in order to prepare me to receive the whole blessing.
The mountaintop view is more beautiful because of the pleasure and relief received after the struggle of climbing up the mountain. God is not rejecting my requests, nor is He taking or keeping the blessing from me. Instead, He is telling me that I am not ready to receive the whole blessing yet. He has some work to do in me first.
What a wonderful and loving God we serve! Like any good parent, He does not always give us what we want. Often, He makes us work for it or prepares us for what we are not yet ready to receive. Then, we certainly will appreciate what we are given more and make the best use of it.
In conclusion, the next time you think He is not answering, look around. You may find that He is answering indeed, but He is doing it …By little and little…
by Crystal Collingsworth
